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Nov 20

Marcus Paulson

i haven't written in such a long time. I finished my first course, then went to Vancouver to try and find a job. I didn't have much luck, not that I tried that hard. I talked to a few people, and found out I was unprepared.

I did manage to get one job interview, mostly out of luck. I went to a web site that had job posting for a lot of companies, and lucked out using a web form. I returned home before they wanted to interview, so I did it by phone. The interview went ok, I guess, but I blew the test they gave me. I am out of programming practice, I guess. Well, I have not heard back in the negative. I sent a thank you card. You never know if that will help or not.

I have been doing nothing all week. I am supposed to be working really hard on my final course. I keep beating myself up about it.

I came to a revelation today. Well, I come to this same revelation every couple of days. I am responsible for my own success or failure. Sure, I have mental health problems, but I can only milk that for so long. I really have to do something productive.

I really should move out of my parents basement. I am considering leaving for Vancouver again in about 2-3 weeks. I can stay with a friend for a bit. I can probably get a job over the holidays, doing something. Will give me a sense of independence. I need that.

I should also be applying for work. My excuse is that I don't have a database to keep track of where I apply. I should get on writing that tomorrow. I need the programming practice.

I keep making excuses and excuses.


Marcus lives with his parents in British Columbia. "E-mail my whiny ass at mwp@columnist.com."

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